Sunday, March 13, 2011

I saw this on EFukt some time ago with a bunch of my idiot friends. I was beyond high when I laid eyes on it. At first I couldn't quite comprehend what I was seeing, as I was in a haze so thick, Cheech and Chong would have been fearful for their lives. On my second view, I geeked the fuck out so hard, I was unable to breathe for close to 5 minutes. I then ate a whole lasagna and tried to explain to my dope buddies why there should be dildos made of sponge material so that women can insert them into their meat wallets so that they can have standing urinals like dudes, and get a little more enjoyment from their urination experience. Another failed business endeavor that becomes abandoned upon exiting the house of a drug dealer. Anyway, enjoy.

Artist Spotlight: Kalter - Spiritual Angel

Real-talk, faggot. Melodic death metal is becoming a dead end as far as originality goes. Since the early 90's, every Swede, Norwegian, and Dane has been pumping out ridiculous amounts of melodeath. A decade of nonstop releases that herald to the glory days of In Flames, Dark Tranquillity and At The Gates. It's tough to find bands now that keep your interest, as you've probably seen and heard most of it by now, thanks to the wave of idiot kids who formed gimmick bands instead of musical bands. It's a sad scene, but every once in a while, you come across a band like Canada's own Kalter. These guys get it right. Check out the opening track from their new album "Spiritual Angel" and rejoice for now, as there is still at least one or two good Melodeath bands around.

Also for good measure, here's a picture of a gigantic abdominal puss.